Emotional Release
by ImmoralOwl
Summary: Yondu is a new captain who's used to being held accountable and punished. It's the first mate's job to make sure the captain doesn't get too far out of line too often. *warning - story contains spanking of a consulting adult and mentions of past slavery/abuse so don't like don't read and stay safe*


*story contains consensual adult spanking and mentions of past abuse/slavery so if those things bother you don't read and keep safe*  
**story also probably contains over use of commas and I feel like I can't keep perspective or tense or whatever it's called very good hahah**

* * *

Yondu awkwardly stood face flushed with shame and a stomach doing barrel rolls in front of his seated First Mate who was just staring at him with what may be a concerned expression or it could just be contained anger at the _reason_ they were both about to do this.

Yondu was a new captain still, the latest mission - the one he had almost royally screw up - was only their fourth mission as a crew and the first one he had messed up in years, although if he was looking for an excuse not to follow through with his demand the mission _was_ a success in the end.

He had felt bad about everything that had happened, it all could have so easily been avoided if he hadn't been so irresponsible.

As a slave, guilt and sentiment were weakness that were a tool for the enemy to use against you but once Stakar had clipped his collar and taken him under his wing he had been told "crew is family and they're important, we look out for each other" and as guilt and sentiment had yet to cause him to ferry kids to a murderous planet God or got him exiled or a crew who would shank him the second he closed his eyes to kiss Kraglin if they were around to see and mutiny on him one too many times he still believed in Stakar's words that softer emotions weren't the ultimate enemy that had been drilled into him by the Kree.

Stakar was obviously soft and sentimental if he had not only taken one look at a young injured slave and took him along instead of leaving him to a slow death by infection and blood loss alone on the outskirts of a battle but continued to care and look out for him with patience a parent might have, not that Yondu would know what parents were like seeing as he couldn't remember his.

Stakar wasn't _soft_ though, oh no Stakar was a badass who could be more than cruel if crossed and if he could be both then clearly his masters had been wrong.

He needed to make those emotions go away though, the guilt of messing up when there was no reason he should have and almost losing members of _his_ family, they were his crew not directly Stakar's crew now and "crew is family" making them his.

Sentiments may not be the ultimate enemy but they certainly weren't helping him feel any better or focus and therefore something had to be done to make them go away right now.

That was the reason for pulling Kraglin past the post success celebration about to start in the mess hall, where the first drinks were being poured as the little landing party to have gone on the mission were starting to regal the rest of the crew with everything that had happened, to their room under the pretense of splitting up the profits to pass out tomorrow when everyone sobered up.

Once the door had clicked locked and Kraglin had finished trying to such his lungs out through his mouth via needy desperate kiss fueled by almost losing his Captain, Yondu had made the most adorable sheepish face Kraglin had ever seen - which should probably never grace the face of someone with Yondu's past and reputation ever - then said he needed to ask him something and not to laugh or they'd find out once and for all if the arrow would respond to an order to go through someone he maybe kinda sorta loved if what he had heard and read about love were accurate.

Kraglin hadn't really questioned his embarrassed confession that he wanted to be punished for the way things had went, in fact all he had said about it was "ya sure cap'n? Ya ain't really gotta answer ta anyone now tha' Stakar ain't on the same ship breathin' down ya neck, less ya break the code" and wasn't _that_ just part of the problem.

Yondu was used to being held accountable when he got out of control, when he was reckless.

When he was a slave if he so much as breathed too hard in the direction of a boundary his master had set he would be punished.

A couple of his masters had punished him the way he had asked Kraglin to but they were mostly the first ones who owned him, when he was still a child and being taught how to grow into a _proper_ behaved slave.

They had been the nicest if nice was a word that could be used to describe them, they didn't whip him very often or inflict some of the more torturous punishments his future owners would, no they had been the few who understood a damaged slave couldn't do their job to optimum efficiency if they were badly injured, the ones who had decided they would rather just train a few great slaves than replace them every few cycles.

It was almost a shame when those ones had been killed or overthrown and he'd been sold to less caring owners - the ones who figured a slave should be able to function no matter their condition or they were useless and better off dead or sold for cheap, the ones who had the mentality of 'you think this is bad just you wait I'll show you real pain' when he did something wrong.

Stakar himself had on occasion done it when Yondu had gotten over his fear that breathing out of line and not being 100% perfect every second would land him wishing he was dead and he'd gone a bit wild with the idea of "you're completely free now, you can do as you want".

It hadn't taken long for him to turn into a wild child who liked the taste of alcohol and wasn't going to let anyone call him names or pick on him without losing a couple teeth.

He was Captain now and as such probably couldn't have Kraglin assign him scrub duty, Stakar's go to for the most part or putting him in a time out like the pouchling he sort of felt like with how stupid he had been.

Both of those would make him a laughing stock to his crew so he had settled on a physical punishment that would not only be able to be kept private in all senses, he trusted Kraglin not to scupper his standings as Captain by blabbing or ever carrying it out anywhere that someone could hear or see them but also wouldn't impede his duties like whip lashes on his back would.

Kraglin was going to give him a spanking.

He bit his lip and got into position over Kraglin's bony lap and reminded himself he had been the one to ask for this, he was the one to all too fast blurt out "ya First Mate, ya my mate-mate, s'your job to keep me in line a lil' once n' awhile n' ya want me ta feel better yea?" when Kraglin's face had turned unreadable at the first half demanded confession of what he wanted.

It _was_ the First Mate's job to keep his Captain in line so he didn't alienate the crew or get them blown up, to gently question outrageous requests or demands on the crew and ship alike so everyone was happy (Captain most of all) and to be Captain's eyes and ears, to see him be accountable to himself if no one else which is why Kraglin had probably agreed to this, he was fiercely loyal and took his job seriously wanting to be the best First Mate possible for everyone onboard.

He got a few seconds to stew once settled before things got started.

Then boy did they, it didn't take long for the bloom of warmth to register followed a split second by 'ow', Kraglin's hand was hard and he'd left his flight gloves on which Yondu assumed made the slaps sting a bit more with the bite of leather.

A little bit longer and he was starting to lose his ability to focus on anything other than 'holy hell it hurts' and it wasn't long after that he realized Kraglin was talking and it took him a second to register what he was saying past the burning in his other end.

There was a tone in Kraglin's voice that Yondu's on-the-verge-of-whimpering brain couldn't register but he could at least focus on the words, Kraglin was listing in order the causes of the punishment and the details of how he ended up here, the list was as follows in what Yondu could at least tell from tone his most grievous offense to least:

He had almost got himself killed

He had hung up on Kraglin mid explanation of _why_ his landing in the BIG clearing would be a bad idea

He almost got the landing crew killed

He caused them to lose an M-Ship which would cut way into what the mission had been worth to replace

The mission being the procuring of an artifact in an abandoned ruin on a planet that was barely habited and said habitants lived several hundred miles away from said ruins and just invented the catapult so no real threat.

Where the mission had gone wrong was when Yondu had decided to be the one to go planetside last minute instead of Kraglin and not mentioning it until him and the other four crew were on the way down and thus having not gone over what the plan details were after the surface had been scanned for anything that might have been left out or changed since the latest update in the Nova database records of the place.

Kraglin had commed him the second he realized what was going on and told, well more like tried to tell, Yondu that there were only two clearings and to land in the smaller one that was 3 miles from the ruins rather than the large one that was only a couple hundred feet from the ruin.

Before he could continue Yondu had rolled his eyes and decided Kraglin was just being his usual over protective self and was afraid the big open space would make them easy targets coming across it should their info be wrong and natives were around so he hung up and immediately proceeded to land there.

The problem with it had been that big open field had a reason for being so open and wasn't actually a field per say at all, it was a pretty much bottomless tarry goo pit that only looked solid.

It didn't take long to figure that out once the ship started to sink and they couldn't blast their way free with the engines, more so when the perfectly preserved body of a large orange bird with its beak open for a gulp of air it would never get and a look of pained terror in its eyes caused by lungs full of goo started to slowly come up along the front windshield.

Yondu had tried to act like he knew they wouldn't be next and break the tension slowly filling the cabin with being funny by flipping on the wipers but they barely moved.  
They all clambered out once they heard the roar of engines, Kraglin knew Yondu enough to know the second he was hung up on that he needed to get to the hanger and head out because his captain was about to do something less than brilliant.

He made it just in time to pluck them all from the top of the sinking ship with only the loss of one boot stuck forever in the goo from the last man off.

He hadn't said anything to Yondu but Yondu knew Kraglin must be irritated with him, he himself would have been livid had the situation been reversed.

Instead Kraglin had simply parked in the _safe_ field, waited with their half booted crew member, and flew them all back.

There was a murmur from above him to break him out of his replaying of events with the verbal reminder of what had caused him to feel the need for physical chastisement that stated he only had five more to go.

There was that unplaceable tone again, was it disappointment?

Five

Oh no, now that he thought about it Kraglin hadn't put up much of a fight over his need to be _hurt_ as punishment so maybe he was mad at him, he had screwed up Kraglin's hard planning and almost died (his body last to goo of all things) and there would have been no body to light up and send into the stars.

Four

Kraglin _had_ to be disappointed in him for being so reckless, for almost fucking up beyond repair. He _had_ to be angry with him, he would have been if Kraglin hadn't cared enough to hear him out and been irresponsible because of it.

Three

What if Kraglin didn't think he was sorry enough?

Two

What if Kraglin decided he didn't want to serve under a captain that was such a stubborn, reckless, thick skulled, impulsive, hot-head?

What if he decided he didn't want a _mate_ that wouldn't listen to him when it was important?

One

Kraglin was going to shove him off any second, yell and scream and stomp out.

Tell him all the things that little insecure portion of his brain brought up when he was alone for too long and memories took ahold and wouldn't let go of growing up being told no one cared about you, you were worthless and this is all you would ever know because of it.

Kraglin was going to leave.  
Kraglin was going to _leave_ _him_.

The shove never came, there weren't any harsh words either, in fact once his brain registered neither were happening and the swats had stopped it realized that the opposite seemed to be true.

Kraglin had slid back on the bed and had him pressed to his side and partially on top of him, Yondu's face tucked into the crook of Kraglin's neck.

Kraglin had one hand gently resting on Yondu's ass and the other rubbing little circles on his back and Kraglin was murmuring again "s'ok… forgiven… I got ya… ain't goin nowhere".

Comfort?

Comfort wasn't what should happen, no, what had always happened after his punishments was more punishment or punishment for crying or being sent to his bunk to be alone - not that he could have been sent to his bunk seeing as they were already in it but Kraglin certainly could have got up and walked out leaving him alone until Kraglin was ready to come sleep.

Yondu wasn't sure he wanted to look at Kraglin just in case his brain was playing tricks on him but part of him needed to in order to shut that insecure little section of his brain (the part he went out of his way to not acknowledge as much as possible) the hell up.

He pulled away enough to get Kraglin's attention and looking in those mildly wet blue eyes he decided he might finally understand what a calm Stakar had meant when he said "this is going to hurt me as much as it does you" before his belt had come down on Yondu's ass that first time Yondu had needed something a little firmer than scrub duty or grounding him from missions to try and reel him in a little.

That tone he couldn't place earlier, the he thought might be deep disappointment or anger, maybe that was concern, maybe it was fear, maybe it was panic.

Yondu was pretty sure Kraglin really loved him, he showed it in the way he always had coffee made just the way he liked it ready for him on Bridge, the way he always put up with his zanier antics or schemes, the way he knew Yondu liked the sweet red veggie thing on his sandwich but not the purple one Kraglin didn't mind and traded him pieces even if Yondu's were slightly bitten, all the little things Kraglin did for him that he sometimes took for granted or didn't return, little things no one else did.

One thing was for sure Yondu didn't want to make Kraglin have to do this again anytime soon if that was the case, if Kraglin cared so much about him that having to discipline him hurt him as well, but, if he did at least he knew Kraglin wouldn't hold it against him once that last smack landed.  
He kind of liked the idea that instead of having to worry about losing Kraglin all he had to do next time he did something dumb or messed up or even got moody and tried to push him away was not being able to sit comfortable for a couple hours.

Kraglin gave a soft smile and said they should go join the others before all the booze were gone and not to worry about drinking too much because he would only have a couple so he could divvy up the payment later so no one would ask why they didn't have it done in the morning when that was what they were supposed to be doing now.

As Kraglin lead the way to the mess hall Yondu couldn't help his own soft smile.  
Kraglin was his safe place.

Kraglin was the perfect First Mate.

The perfect mate.

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A/N - So my work hubby and I were watching the scene where they pick Peter up after Knowhere and he goes "look at Kraglin's face, it's the face of a man who's done with Yondu's shit, like this is the nth time Yondu's carved a path for his kid to talk his way out of punishment knowing it's going to bite them all in the ass and Kraglin's half glare is just all 'fine but you're going to be lucky to sit by the time we get to Xander' kind of glare at him"  
Which got us talking about the fact Yondu's used to getting smacked around and some times people who are end up not being to function without it to some extent and spends all day being the biggest badass in the room and might need a breather where he's taken in hand.


End file.
